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Sometimes, when I was feeling very low about my life, the answer was yes, that I wished I'd never met him. If I didn't ever know how much I could love someone it would have been a lot easier to love your father. I was convinced during those times that my life would have been better just with that one thing. Jimmy, I've often thought that your dad's life and your life and Phil's would have been better then too. Your dad changed a lot when he gave up on loving me after he was sure that I would never grow to love him. He'd been pretty much a happy man up until then. Most of the time though, the great majority really, I remember my excitement, the raw power of my feelings, I was so alive, all of my senses were heightened when he was around me. I can remember specific times when we were together, as clear if it had been yesterday. I remember being so full of the joy of simply having him touch me, of him whispering little nonsense things that made me almost jump out of my skin with desire.. He quickly decided that a cup of tea might help pacify his unexpected guest.She was a fine looking woman, he mused, when she wasn’t demanding money with menaces. Majestically tall, with handsome features and built on statuesque lines that would always garner eager male attention.Having blown her nose noisily, Tobias ventured further into the room, sat opposite her and asked cautiously, “May I inquire who you might be, madam?”“Eliza Gutteridge,” she replied promptly. Tobias looked blank at this totally unfamiliar name, which rang no bells in his admittedly not entirely reliable memory. In response to his obvious lack of recognition, the lady sat up straight, pushed out her formidable bosom and pronounced in reverberating and suddenly alarmingly gentile tones, ‘but my nom professionel is Fifi Fontayne.”“Ah,” replied Tobias, as enlightenment dawned. He wouldn’t have forgotten that name in a hurry as it had caused such heated consternation recently for the Whitmore matriarch and thus,.
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