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But, if I was going to givethis thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised.Am I wrong?So, there I sat! in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and Tazer in another.The directions said that:a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant;a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; anda three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water.Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference (loaded with two itsy, bitsy AAA batteries); pretty cute really, and thinking to myself, 'no possible way!'What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best.I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on. Nola was almost giddy and maybe I was a little that way myself.I had trouble getting to sleep. It was Rick, of course, that bothered me. First, he had named Mary unfaithful in a more or less public setting. Also he named me as the one that she was unfaithful with. I had the feeling, Rick, dead as he might be, was not through with me. I suppose I had until the 25th of November before I would find out. That was three months from today.It was difficult to concentrate on carving in the morning. I knew I was too hyper to do the small detail work on the shaman. I roughed out the two child figures. Nola went along to the church soup kitchen for the noon meal. "I suppose you told everyone how rich you are now," I asked when I picked her up."No, I didn't tell a soul. Dad, I think we should find someone to advise me what to do with my inheritance. There are a hundred things I have thought to do when a person has so much money. The soup kitchen needs larger quarters. I'll bet if I suggested.
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