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It was becoming second nature to act as a female. I thought about what my life had become. I mean, I have already overstated the obvious, I am now a woman who is pregnant. No, what I thought about was what it meant to be a mother. I mean, at first, I figured that I would just give the baby to Jeremy and that would be the end of it. But now? Now I was wondering what it would be like to be this child's mother. I would be giving this child life, yet I was somehow beginning to feel like I needed to protect it and nurture it. Was I really the mothering kind? It felt as though it would be somehow rewarding to raise this child. As a father of two children I always got the third handed approach to parenting. I was only there part of the time since I was out putting bread on the table. I mostly got to do the discipline or an occasional hug at bed time. But to actually be with a child for the first five years of its life? Well, it wasn't like I was going to go back to being a father. I wanted. If I left a toy out, Mother wouldscream at me. It's not like she didn't let me play with toys, but whenfinished, everything in its place and a place for everything. This meantdolls in one place, games in another. Books belonged in alphabeticalorder on the bookrack. Sounds crazy, huh? Well, when you grow up with it,it's normal. Mother never took me to McDonalds and any other type of fastfood restaurant. It was always salads and girl portions, with whitegloves and napkins on my lap. Somehow she was independently wealthy, andshe's never talked with me about where the money came from.The doorbell rang about 10 am and Mother walked to the door to answer it.We weren't expecting guests today and I was still dressed a bit peculiarthis day. I started walking up the stairs so whoever was here wouldn'tsee me dressed like this. Mother called to me to come to the door as Ihad a visitor. "Mother, I can't come to the door like this!" I pleaded."Don't be silly, Jamie, your friend Tammie is here to.
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