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” “Like doctor-patient confidentiality?” “Exactly like that. So, no sex for Alex…yet.” She marked something on the form. “Let’s see. Do you experience spontaneous erections at inappropriate times?” She looked at my persistent bulge. “I’ll mark that one with a big ol’ yes.” I wanted to cover myself again, but I knew that would only draw more attention to it. “How often do you have dreams of a sexual nature?” “Um…I don’t know…maybe once or twice a week.” “Oh, okay, then.” “Why? Is that a lot? Too many? It’s probably less than that.” “No, that’s a good number.” She gave me a look. “Of course, boys tend to cut the number in half because they’re embarrassed, so that means for you it’s more like four times a week. And, of course, we only remember an average of about fifteen percent of our dreams, which puts you at about twenty-five or so erotic dreams a week. You’re a very sexual y oriented young man.” “Are there many more questions like this?” “Is this making you uncomfortable?” “A. A “slut-angel” combination, you’re a fucking genius. Get your publicist on it. Get her on some web sites. Get her fucking some boy band singer and get slutty photos on the web. Get her into some clubs and load up the paps to take her photo. You know the fucking game John.” Dan paused catching his breath. “Just get it done John. You know what you have to do. I don’t want to be running around finding a replacement for this girl.” John chuckled to ease his friend’s mind. “I have my assistant Danielle send over the paperwork tomorrow.” Dan turned and looked at John with a faux look of shock. He reached out his hand and the two men shook hands. As they were shaking Dan looked John in the eyes. “You know I don’t do contracts John. You have my word and my word is stronger than oak.” John laughed. “Don’t fucking try to ‘Gerry Maguire’ an agent. That Cushman routine isn’t getting you anywhere Dan. Danielle is sending over the contract.” Dan smiled and laughed. “You have the most gorgeous.
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