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Do you always run in the nude?' one asked.'Oh yes!' he replied, gasping in air. 'It feels so wonderfully free!'Another runner moved a long side. 'Do you always run carrying your clothes with you under your arm?''Oh, yes' our friend answered breathlessly. 'That way I can get dressed right at the end of the run and get in my car to go home!'Then a third runner cast his eyes a little lower and asked, 'Do you always wear a condom when you run?''Nope ... just when it's rainingThis one is compliments of chuckNOW THAT'S ITALIAN...An Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite ravioli wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs. When he reached the bottom of the stairs. he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen, where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in. So after Carol left, I did what every loser does, I got drunk, a lot. The next two weeks were kind of a blur. Thank God my boss liked me and I was pretty good at what I did for a living or I would have got my ass fired. He sympathized with me but like everyone else he had more than enough on his own plate to worry about me. The one thing that brought me back to reality was the fact that all my friends were really Carol’s friends, who just put up with me for her sake. No one wanted to hang out with me or even stop after work for a drink anymore. ‘Fuck them all, I don’t need them,’ I said to myself as I stopped at our old watering hole by myself for the tenth night in a row. I was going downhill fast and if it wasn’t for the fact that I had a running partner who wouldn’t take no for an answer, I would have lost it. ‘Steve, get your sorry ass up,’ he yelled as he pounded on my door at six o’clock in the morning. ‘Steve, you look like shit, what are you, still drunk?’ Dan asked me as I.
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