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Vivian had begun to think that the Church was strangely obsessed with sexual matters even though no one would admit to it. One of the areas where that appeared was in the preoccupation with the horrible deaths of venerable martyrs, many of whom had quite a bit of sexual sadism involved with their demise.One of them was St. Ursula herself, who was supposedly one of 11,000 virgins beheaded by Huns near Cologne in the Fourth Century. Vivian thought the story lacked credibility, but the Church thought highly of her, enough to even name Vivian’s school after her. Better to lose your head than your hymen. She thought that was one of the unspoken lessons to be learned from the school’s namesake. Why hadn’t those Hun guys banged all of those chicks instead of killing them? After all, with 11,000 of them, there seemed to be more than enough to go around.She had also seen a medieval painting of the death of St. Engratia, a young woman flagellated to death around the year 303. Vivian thought. . and they sure don't shoot... Watch your back Morty"He told me this because I've been working on a case that involves some fucknuts hiring me to spy on his wife. As luck would have it she's fucking some Italian guy who not only has an 8 inch dick, but is also smuggling loads of cocaine from somewhere outta state. When i confronted the dame: "Why are you fuckin' around with this shit weasle? You're gonna get in a big mess of trouble?"She told me: "He's just a guy, When i met him I didn't know he was into that junk." Why are you fucking around anyway?" I asked her."My husband's privates are about a 3rd the size of Vincent's." Well how big is Vinny?" I asked just outta sheer curiosity."8 and 1/2 inches." she told me with a smug look, just before lighting her cigarette.In retrospect I wonder what that girl would'a done if I told her i had a 10 and a half inch demon lurking in my trousers. Anyhow a few days after I got to talk to her Vinny, or one of his thugs, left a note for me: "Don't.
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