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The reason I've asked you to visit is for your advice." I'm honoured, my lord." How long is it since you retired, Eric?" I didn't retire as such, my lord." No, I guess not. In what year did you last serve as Member of Parliament for Reigate, Eric?" The General Election of '68." That's when they redrew the boundaries, wasn't it? It's become harder and harder for decent men to represent the country." Much harder, my lord." Who represents Reigate now, Eric?" An incompetent idiot from the Social and Liberal Democratic Party, my lord." I can't keep up with all these new political parties. Whatever happened to the old certainties, Eric?" The electorate is perverse, my lord. They would prefer to be represented by a rabble of pretty much identical pinko political parties rather than by a sensible choice between a strong Conservative government and a weak coalition of Greens and Socialists." You were never one of those who liked it when the Tories merged with the Liberals, were you?" It only. “I can’t find the ad that I placed in the local free paper. Fuck! What a cunt lappin’ douche bag paper…Oh here it is”Richard Widemouth had just graduated from La Varenne, prestigious culinary school in France, and had decided to start his own business in Chicago. His specialty was salad preparation. Perhaps “salad” was the wrong word for one of Richard Widemouth’s creations. A salad made by Richard Widemouth was a full meal nutritionally and quantitatively. He was very good at what he did.The ad was just as he had presented it. It read…“I’LL TOSS YOUR SALAD!YOU SUPPLY THE GOODSI’LL DO ALL THE WORKSATISFACTION GUARANTEED!$15 RICHARD 555-5555 “Suddenly, the phone rang. Richard Widemouth answered the phone“Hello” said Richard in a voice that sounded like a friendly buttercup“Hi. I’m calling about the ad in the Reader. Is this Richard?”“Yes, this is Richard” said Richard Widemouth in a voice that was more persimmon than buttercup“Well I’m James and I want my.
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