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"Hello. I was just about to move but I had food spilled all over my..." Save the excuse. You parked your car next to the fire hose all day! I've been driving back and forth, and you still haven't moved it. Here you go, and if I were you, I would hop in your car right now, being way out of uniform and all." Roger that Sergeant."What a fucking douche. Just want to punch this guy so bad, but whatever. I can take care of this next payday. Time to leave. Turn on the car, it's almost time for the flag. Fuck! At least get out of here before he comes back and I knock him out. I'll drive to the laundromat, salute and be on my way. Oh look, she's still there. And there goes the flag. Time to get out and show my respects. Dun, dun da duuuun, dun dun da Dunn.....BOOM! And not paying attention, my pants come down again!How embarrassing and she saw it all. And here I am saluting while my left hand is clutching my pants. I just hope no one else saw that. Ok flag completed. Time to get outta..."You!. .. I wasn't having much fun and it sounded like a road trip ... at the very least. I okayed it."Okay, what?" asked Wendy.The longer I talked the madder she got. When I said I might as well go ... she turned sheet white."No!" She stamped her little foot."No?" I don't care if you blow your money on some beatup old tugboat ... if you feel the need, I'm okay with it," she said. "I'm NOT okay with you going. This baby is due within the month and I won't have you leaving me ... holding the bag ... so to speak." I'm staying home, Eels," I said, "Tell me something, Eels?" What?" He was getting upset ... good sized tugs are hard to find."Who owns the wreck?" I asked. I nodded my head forward, indicating the half submerged tug on the other side of the tee wharf."I do," he said. "Why?" I wanna practice on it," I said."Practice?" Yeah ... I want to see if I can raise it, repair it, and maybe use it," I explained. "It would keep me home where I can hear Wendy." Hel, you can have it," Eels.
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