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4. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.5. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad’sunderwear when he’s on the toilet.6. Sticking my nose into someone’scrotch is an unacceptable way of saying ‘hello’.7. I don’t need to suddenly standstraight up when I’m under the coffee table.8. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur beforeentering the house - not after.9. I will not come in from outside,and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.10. I will not sit in the middle of the livingroom, and lick my crotch11. The cat is not a ‘squeaky toy’,so when I play with him and he makes that noise,it’s usually not a good thing.P.S. Dear God:When I get to Heaven,may I have my testicles back?Some Random Thoughts... Someone Just Honked to get me out of my parking spot faster so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.So I was at the bar last night and the Waitress Screamed... “Anyone know CPR?”I said, “Hell I know the entire alphabet.”Everyone laughed... Well everyone except this one. "This time there wasn't a phone ringing. Candice could see from the expression on Mike's face that this stop in mid-conversation was because he'd thought of something."Candice," he began, smiling. "I think I know a way to solve all our problems."Upon hearing those words, Candice's heart felt like it had skipped a beat. "Really? What is it? I'll do anything you ask." Well, I need a new girl to fill in for today's filming and you need an opportunity to show our company you are worth the gamble. So here's the deal, you fill in for our no show on today's filming and I can guarantee you a three month internship at Venus Studios with a further nine month extension subject to performance. What do you say?" What will I need to do?" asked Candice fully aware of the nature of a certain proportion of Venus Studio's recordings. There was only so much she was prepared to do for her career."Oh it's nothing sexual." reassured Mike, "It's a dating show we do. Basically we get a guy and three girls up.
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