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”Today is my baby girl’s 18th birthday. I be so glad that this be my last child support payment! Month after month, year after year, all those payments!So I call my baby girl, LaKeesha, to come to my house, and when she get there, I say: “Baby girl, I want you to take this check over to yo momma house and tell her this be the last check she ever be gettin’ from me, and I want you to come back and tell me the ‘spression on yo mama’s face.” So, my baby girl take the check over to her momma.I be anxious to hear what she say, and ‘bout the ‘spression on her face.Baby girl came back and walk through the door, I say, “Now what yo momma say ‘bout that?”She say to tell you that “you ain’t my daddy” ... and watch the ‘spression on yo face.An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Rimini, Italy, went to the local church for confession.When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said:“Father, during World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighborhood. She is strawberry blond, 5'7", 140 lbs with 36C maybe D tits.I got home and called her after being home for a couple of days. Had to spend time with my family. We made plans to go out on Saturday night. I put on some tight jeans, a tight fitting t-shirt and left to pick her up. I am not a bad looking guy. I am 5'7", 170lbs, 12% body fat, short black hair and big brown eyes.We drove from her small city to another one with some better clubs and less likely to run into my ex-wife. We started the night out early, well before the bar started to get busy. We started off with some beer and a couple of shots of Tequila. Keep in mind that being gone for a year and not having any alcohol it did not take me long to get a buzz going. I complimented Kirsten on her tight jeans and cleavage revealing blouse. Kirsten complimented me on my jeans and then asked if she could ask a personal question. I told her to go ahead. She asked if I was wearing boxers as she couldn't find an underwear line. I.
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