“It is a rather economical solution to all of our problems,” his mother said.“There is a method to our madness,” Mrs. Emery said patting Suzie on the arm.“More like a madness to your method,” Sean said.After glancing at the clock, his mother said, “There are still a lot of things to do. You kids run along on your date so that we can get to the serious business of getting things ready for tonight.”Suzie rose from her chair and asked, “Where are we going?”“We’re going to the Surf and Turf. I’m going to eat fried shrimp until I barf,” Lily said.“Please don’t barf,” Suzie said thinking this was going to turn into the date from hell.“Remember, you have to be back at eight,” his mother said.This was the first that Sean had heard of that. Shocked, he said, “Eight?”“Isn’t that a little early to end a date?” Suzie asked. Even with Lily along they should have been able to stay out until nine.“We have our plans and they require you to be home at eight. Now run along and have a perfectly horrible. It took two years and many girlfriends between us before he finally opened up to me completely.One day we were having an IM session and I was telling him about the new job and generally catching up since I was freshly out of college and we didn’t see each other as often as we did in the past. At this point he was 21 years old and still attending school. After the pleasantries and a few friendly insults, it started:Chad: Hey man, I just took that online purity test and I know you took it too. What score did you get?Me: I'm only 36% pure. What did you get?Chad: Yeah, um you’re 36% pure. I’m 38% pure and I figured I’d have a lower score that you.Me: No shit. I would think so too, with all the stories you’ve told me about.Chad: Well, especially with all the things I I’ve done; before you ask, I don't want to talk about and lets leave it at that.Me: I guess, couldn't be any worse than mine. Why do you think you score should be lower than mine?Chad: It was a while ago and I'm not proud of.
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