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He called me 'Brenda'. Bryan and I often talked about things as equals rather than as a person of authority instructing a child. I felt my role was more about guiding him than commanding him to obey. I guess what I am trying to explain is that I was an advisor and a trusted consult more than an authoritative parent. My excuse: My mind wanders frequently; often in ways I do not intend, or want. I do not know if I am unique or not, but on occasion, I find myself thinking about things that society deems highly inappropriate. As I watched him grow from an adolescent to a fine young man, some of these inappropriate thoughts involved Bryan. These daydreams or fantasies were not terribly wicked; but they were definitely inappropriate. I would imagine accidently walking in on him masturbating; Bryan accidently walking in on me when I was dressing, or when I was in the shower. When I allowed myself to explore inappropriate fantasies, I did so with the strong belief that these were only. Irealized I probably looked the same way."I would argue that I've made your life much better," Coach repliedcoolly. "By the time you're healed, playing with intensity and passionwill be second nature to you, and you'll take the court by storm. If I'mwrong, I'll let you do what you wish with me after the season is over - Ipromise." You're so wrong, it's not even going to be funny," Jordyn fumed. "Imean, you're wrong about doing this in the first place. I already playwith intensity and passion. There's no way that forcing me to be acheerleader will somehow make me a better basketball player."Coach smiled mirthfully. "We'll just have to wait and see, won't we?" hechuckled. "It will only help you if you really put your heart into it,though," he warned. "If you slack off as a cheerleader, you'll slack offas a player for the rest of your career." We'll see about that," Jordyn glared back. Coach turned to me."And what about you? Do you think you can give me a couple weeks of solidleadership.
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