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"She'd-" I pause, looking down and trying hard not to cry. "I don'tknow. I'd like to think she'd love me no matter what, but with Dad- Ijust don't know!" At this, the tears start freely flowing. Charlotte isinstantly at my side, hugging me and letting me cry myself out on hershoulder."You want a family," Charlotte says softly. "We all do..." It's not like we were particularly close beforehand," I croak, havingfinally calmed down. "Mum and dad both worked, they never had any timefor me. Then they decided I wasn't meeting their standards so theykicked me out, like I was their underperforming employee rather thantheir underperforming so-" I pause before completing that word."I'm finished for Christmas after today," Ellen announces. "If you dodecide to go and meet them obviously I'll go with you." I smile andalmost begin crying again, tears of gratitude."Thank you," I whisper."Now," Ellen announces firmly, standing up, "you girls aren't paying meto chat, you're paying me to teach. I want. Having one ofmy own. And I never did. I was the bookworm with school or working allthe time to build my companies. And then it was tgirls, with all theright attitudes but never the looks. And now I have you and you're bothand I want that, Kristy. Can't you see how bad I want it? I've beendangling all of it right in front of you for weeks now and you neveracted on it. And now I find out you used to be a hooker and I'm notsupposed to want to see what that's like? What it's like to be withthat sort of person? For twenty years that's all I've wanted."He was rambling now and I didn't want to stop him but I had to ask ..."Have you ever been with a hooker?" No," he said. "I couldn't. And you know why? Because I knew shewould never be mine. That it would be fake because I was just a job forher. Just a guy."Ryan was emotional and raw. He leaned over and kissed me and I swoonedunder his weight and passion. I needed him urgently and we were able tomove the passenger seat.
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