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Perhaps the most important offer you have ever received.”“An offer is it?”“Yes, but first some background. I am afraid your mother was not totally forthcoming with you and I avoided the issue by remaining away. Perhaps we both should have shared what I’m about to tell you years ago. It might have made things easier for you.”Easier, I don’t understa...”He smiled. “Of course you don’t. That’s why I am here.”“Please, what is this all about?” she asked.“First I need to go back in time, before you were born. Your mother and I had been close since childhood, but when I left and began my career she married your father. He was a good man but, frankly, not very satisfying for her — sexually.”Hmmmm,’ she thought, Dad and Rob have something in common.“Why are you telling me this?”“Please, dear Gwen, be patient and everything will become clear. In my many travels I discovered, or perhaps I should say I was discovered by, a very special couple. They were somewhat older than myself, but very world. Why are you sure it’s a mare?”“Well, when I was riding down the final straight all alone, I saw a kid in the crowd point in my direction and call out ‘Hey Dad, check out the big cunt on this horse’.”At a G8 summit, after a pretty contentious set of meetings, Presidents Trump and Putin go for a walk in the nearby woods to see if they can come to a personal agreement on the issues. As they’re walking along the path Jesus appears in front of them.They’re even more surprised when he says to them, “Gentlemen, you need to try harder to resolve your differences. Anything is possible if you put your minds to it.”The both vocally disagree, saying resolution is impossible, to which Jesus replies, “Look, I’ll prove anything’s possible to you!”“How!” they chorus.“Follow me.” Jesus leads them to a nearby wide, fast-flowing river, and stops at the edge.“Look, if I said it is possible to walk across the river, you’d say it is impossible. If you put your mind to it, it is entirely possible. Look,.
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