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I looked over at the boys, and down at myself, and noticed that all our cocks had shriveled up in the cool water. I leaned up on one elbow and watched as the boys’ cocks started to thaw out and lengthen, and then I made my first suggestive comment to the boys.I was looking right at their crotches when I said, “Damn, boys, that cold water sure shriveled up our junk. But I can see that they’re coming back to normal. You boys sure don’t have anything to be ashamed of in that department, and the girls should be chasing you for those things.”Jeff looked over at me smiling and said, “Yeah, Tom, we noticed that you were checking us out in the boat when we pissed. But shit, man, you don’t have anything to be ashamed of either, especially for an older guy.”I wanted to let them know that I had more than a little interest in their cocks, and took more risk, saying, “Yeah, sorry that I was watching you that way. It’s just that I’m surprised that young boys like you are hung so well, and I was. I closed the door, sat on the floor in the corner by my bed, and I started crying. My anger switched to fear. I started calling different friends, hoping I'd hear something that would give me the courage to come out to my family. One of my friends had come out a few months prior, and her family disowned her. I was on the phone with her, trying to keep my voice together, and she told me it would be OK. As I heard my siblings getting ready to leave for their friends' houses, I knew my window of opportunity was closing. That was the moment. I hung up the phone, opened my bedroom door, walked down the hallway into the kitchen with my head down, and started crying. All my anger left. All my fear left. I felt exhausted, defeated, and vulnerable. In between sobs, I said, 'I'm gay.' The aftermath: I had less support than I realized i would have, which included a mock coming-out party, rainbow-painted cake, and a coming-out CD with Diana Ross' 'I'm Coming Out.'"To tell you the truth, My mom.
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