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"Herbert," she said. "Why are you wearing my clothes?"With an uncharacteristically high heart the man replied in a scratchy, squeaky voice: "I am not Herbert. I am Helen. And these are my clothes. Do you like them?"The man gracefully rose from the table. He loved sunny, shining mornings like this. His brawny, hairy arms bulged forth from a sleeveless, ankle-length floral print dress several sizes too small for his bulky frame. The man's feet, narrowly squeezed into silver-accented women's sandals, lithely danced across the kitchen floor towards the wife. She could just make out the outline of her bra and underwear beneath the tightly-worn dress. The wife cringed at the silhouetted bulge of the man's clearly unfeminine crotch. "Men do not wear dresses," she said to him coldly. "Your name is Herbert and not Helen. Now go put on your own clothes this instant."The man had never liked his wife's cold, scolding voice. He liked it even less on a sunny morning while wearing his favourite. "Katie laughed as I looked at her, slightly bemused."Is that true?" I asked. "Do you need to get out more?" I think he's just sick of hearing Natalie and me in bed," she grinned."Oh really?" I asked. "That's going well then?" I asked. Before Katie had a chance to respond the events planned for this evening came rushing back to me. "Oh shit," I said, grimacing at my memory lapse."What?" Katie wanted to know."Um... I suppose I can tell you," I stammered. "Remember the plans Heather and Natalie had for the three of us?" I asked."Yeah... are they on?" she asked. I nodded in response. "Cool, when?" Tonight." What's the problem?" Katie asked."I just asked you over for drinks. I don't know if that's such a great idea!" Nonsense," Katie laughed. "I already told you I like to watch. Now, forget the whole thing and just let it happen." She tapped me on the head, making a hollow sound with her mouth. "You think too much, dummy. Just go with it. Besides, I told you to invite me, now let's.
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