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The hardest six months of my whole life and I have never felt so alive, so, so, vital! I don't know if it's the lack of sex or the new self-control that he's ingrained into me. I can come now just by thinking about it although I'm not altogether sure that that is his training. We have spent the last week almost exclusively learning mental self-control and part of it is just not sinking in. The part where you stop thinking about IT. I have to make it get through to him that I need sex, unlike him, occasionally at least. I don't understand his total self-control his total lack of physical need. He doesn't need anything- except to live his own way without others hindering him. All he wants to do is live and be left alone and in this one thing I think I can help.I asked him this morning how long before he would consider my training complete, he just laughed and replied that he "would see". I feel within myself that I am ready and I will talk it over with him tonight after his medicinal. Being the youngest child and only son, Thumbs took to pimping his mothers and three older sisters from an early age and by thirteen was running his own whorehouse after stabbing the previous owner two or three dozen times. He was mean enough to kick any of his whores (family included) out onto the streets without a copper the moment any of them lost their looks, stopped attracting customers or dared to defy him in even the slightest way. In the twenty years or more since, Thumbs had become a powerful street-captain controlling nearly half of the criminal operations on the wilder west side of the city. With age and experience had not come any wisdom. He had only gotten meaner, richer and his ego (which had always been healthy) was stratospheric.Nominally, Thumbs was just one of a dozen of fairly senior 'street officers' within the thieves' guild and wasn't particularly noted as worthy for future promotion within the highest leadership circle of the organization, but Thumbs held.
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