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If I did a follow-up call, I always received vague responses, if anyone would talk to me. I was discussing my troubles with friends and they suggested I try real estate sales until I found a job I liked in my field. They thought my friendly demeanor, business background and attractiveness, would work well in that field. It also provided the opportunity for more mainstream business contacts, and would provide better references when I did find a job I wanted."Dancing would not fit well with real estate so I planned on stopping once my bank account was enough to carry me for a while. It was about that time my friend decided to take a position on an island resort, as an escort, companion and entertainer. She really wanted me to go with her. The owners of the dance club really wanted me to stay, as they felt my performances brought in a lot of customers. A few months after graduating I left the club on good terms. The last night the owners told me that I had a position with them any time. As I stood there waiting for my turn to walk across the stage, I had tolisten to each person getting cheered as their name was called. When myname was called, only Amy and her parents applauded. Other than that,there was silence. I wanted to run away and have a cry. My parentsdidn't even care enough to show up for what was supposed to be one ofthe biggest days of my life.After the ceremony, Amy went to the school wide party. I just went homewith her parents since I had nowhere else to go. I felt so alone andunloved. After all, who really cared about me?She had begged me to go with her but I felt she would be a lot more funwithout me there since I was so depressed by what my parents had done.Starting that day, I sank into a state of depression. I even consideredkilling myself so I would not be a bother or burden to anyone. Why not?I was feeling worthless and so unloved.I lost almost all interest in life. Most days, I would just sit andstare at the television. My appetite was almost.
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