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No ID, no entry," said the agent."But I can prove I'm an American!" he exclaimed. "I have a picture of Ronald Reagan tattooed on one side of my butt and George Bush on the other." This I gotta see," replied the agent. With that, the guy dropped his pants and showed the agent his behind."By golly, you're right!" exclaimed the agent. "Have a safe trip back to Chicago."Thanks!" he said. "But how did you know I was from Chicago?"The agent replied, "I recognized Obama in the middle."This question with the answer has been provided by Mark... Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?A: The pickup truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."This one is compliments of John from the land down under:Police work can be entertaining as well as dangerous.Recently, a female sheriff's deputy arrestedPatrick Lawrence, a 22 year old white male, who was fornicating with a pumpkin in the middle of a field at night. The. A year of masturbating and moaning and letting my parents know I pleasured myself had done nothing. My mother just gave me an understanding smile and my father pretended I didn't do anything.“It's good that you're pleasuring yourself, sweetheart,” she'd told me. “You shouldn't let your desires bottle up. Do you want me to buy you any toys?”It wasn't right.The closest I came to punishment today was suffering going to the Cold Stone Creamery and sitting with my parents eating ice cream like a child. While my pussy burned and itched. I couldn't satiate myself. I was denied my own pleasure. I focused on that, trying to fantasize it was deliberate, that my father knew I had a hot cunt needing to be touched and punished me by denying me any chance of satiating myself.But he had no idea that I needed to masturbate. I was sure if he did, he'd drive us home right now and give me all the privacy I needed to satiate myself. If I asked, he'd probably go buy me a sex toy to make sure that I had.
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