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He walked through the open door of the pub and sat down next to the woman.‘Mrs Fitzgerald, ‘ he said sternly. ‘This is no place for a member of my congregation. Why don’t you let me take you home?’‘Sure, ‘ she said with a slur, obviously very drunk.When Mrs Fitzgerald stood up from the bar, she began to weave back and forth. The Reverend realized that she’d had far too much to drink and grabbed her arms to steady her. When he did, they both lost their balance and tumbled to the floor.After rolling around for a few moments, the Reverend wound up on top of Mrs. Fitzgerald, her skirt hiked up to her waist.The pub landlord looked over and said, ‘Oi Mate, we won’t have any of that carrying on in this pub.’The Reverend looked up at the landlord and said, ‘But you don’t understand, I’m Pastor Flapps.’The landlord nodded and said, ‘Oh well, if you’re that far in, you might as well finish.’This one is compliments of J & BSEX and GRAMMAROn his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate. We wouldn’t experiment with each other, but we did enjoy masturbating together. We always knew when one of us came, because we’d be running off to the bathroom with a blanket around our waist to clean up. Mike had told me that we were going to take the room with the VCR/DVD player, so I decided to grab some movies for the week. I also grabbed some porno, hoping that we could masturbate while watching porn together again, for old times sake. A few nights into the trip, after everyone was asleep, and we were talking in our room quietly, the conversation drifted to the topic of sex, as it usually does. “How far have you gotten with a girl”, he asked me. I hadn’t gotten very far. “I’ve felt up a chick before, and she gave me a hand job”, I lied. I really only made out with a few girls before at parties. “Yeah well I’ve gotten head, and I ate this one girl out last month”.Talking about this subject got me aroused. “Speaking of the subject, I brought a video along, one like we used to.
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