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I wasn't attached so I could please myself. I woke early Saturday morning and went for my usual run, I was running back towards the house when I saw Trish and Ray."Hi mate" said Ray."Hey, how's it going " I said. "Oh, not so bad, I'm off on a bowls tournament, I'm just about to leave as I've got a 3 hour drive and have to be in Manchester by 12 o clock" Ray had joined the local crown Green bowls club and was something of a star player. He looked the part in a pair of grey slacks and a crisp white polo, he was just putting his bowls in the boot when Trish came out to see him off."Play well love" she said "I'll see you tomorrow evening" she gave him a kiss on the cheek and waved him off."Hi Steve, how was the run" she said."Oh fine thanks Trish, just done my usual 10k....I'm ready for a shower" Ray's off to Manchester now so I'm alone this weekend, I might see you later" with that she smiled and went inside.She was so attractive and I was constantly thinking about the previous weekend,. Women dressedand made-up to entice me to use them as a man uses a woman. The readingof the will stunned me to my masculine core. Now I was faced withbecoming a woman over a long torturous two year period. Why the hellwould I want to be a woman? Hundreds of millions of dollars which couldbe spent just as easily by a woman as they could be spent by a man? Iwas not greedy person, nor was I a person who did not look at facts inas rational a manner as possible. All these years of my male life,thinking and feeling that I was not what everyone wanted me to be. Sowhat! Yes, so what. Well, "What" really was a big thing. Never seeingin the eyes of your mother, the total love you wanted to find there.Never hearing an "I love you" from your Grandmother or feeling herloving embrace. "What" had I done wrong? Could I ever make it right?Grandmother was gone in body, but not in spirit. My Mother was standingright in front of me, looking into my eyes with a look of hope. A hopethat something I could.
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