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Robbie's face fell when he saw I couldn't budge it, and he joined me, Evadne, too, whilst Rebecca stood by making sarcastic remarks about our strength and fitness Under our combined efforts, the column began to rotate with the grinding noise of long disuse. Then, as the oil worked its way into the crude machinery, pushing the bar became easier and a easier until I could rotate the column alone – although it was something I wouln't care to do for long.But Robbie was optimistic. The apparatus was old; but he could replace most of it with modern equivalents, stronger and far lighter. And so he did, inviting us back to the shed a couple of days later to test the mechanism in its new guise. Sure enough, the bar, still set at waist height, was much easier to push, almost negligible, in fact. Robbie hooked a bucket to the chain, then another and another, until ten buckets were spaced equally apart. I noticed immediately the moment when, far below, the leading bucket filled and began to. As my prey turned and feigned mopping the same spot for the eighteenth time, I noticed purple bruises on the back of each thigh. "Did she beat you?" certain I had broken the case wide open....but nooooo!"Beat...no. Paddled...yes." I was suddenly confused while in the background, the PA system crackled, "Doc Brown, your DeLorean is being towed." Followed by a male voice in the distance, shouting, "Great Scott!" "Is that why you left, because she paddled you?" I asked amid the cacophony.Surprisingly, with adulation, she answered, "Fuck no! She was a Michaelangelo with the paddle!" Michaelangelo?" I repeated incredulously."Or Raphael..or Donatello...one of them mutant turtles." Regardless, she wants you back." Angrily, she turned, her mop flinging dirty, soapy water from my head to toe, causing me to slip to the floor, writhing in the filth, screaming, "She slimed me!"Then, on a pop culture roll, stumbling to my feet, I surveyed the watery mess splashing through the hallway like a.
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