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Shit. I needed a piece of loose leaf. ‘Here,’ Kevin handed me a cucumber, ‘Just make a mark in it or something.’ I turned the cucumber over in my hand. It was definitely longer and fatter than any dick I’d seen. I was surprised it was in Cody’s refrigerator. ‘Alright, this is the cucumber of truth,’ I said holding up the gourd and pointing to his hard-on, ‘I’m going to put it up against your um. . .’ boner, cock, junk, willy, wiener, doodle, purple-headed-yogurt-slinger, ‘. . .thing, and make a mark on this side.’ Cody nodded. I measured, digging my fingernail in the cucumber where his penis ended and marking it with a CD. I’m anything if efficient when it comes to measuring guys’ dicks. In the bathroom, Jeff and I went through the same routine, and I didn’t need a damn cucumber of truth to know Cody had the advantage. I don’t know, but there is something about that extra foreskin. One day years from now, we would gather around and talk about how ridiculous this whole experience. After only a few strokes he was done, and Katie could tell already back to thinking about work. She left the picnic basket and assured him that she was satisfied. Jackson had always been quick, but she hoped he would grow out of it someday. She wondered why that day couldn’t be today. She kissed her husband and told him to hurry home for round 2. He muttered something and looked back down at his work. Still yearning for fulfillment she was dismissed to return to her solitude. Out of sheer desperate need for relief she found herself there on the floor of the elevator still basking in the glow of masturbation. The new bride of Hampsted Village’s golden boy was confused and ashamed but satisfied.She felt the car slowing and quickly stood and did the best she could to rearrange herself. There was nobody else in the building besides the guard, but she couldn’t afford to take any chances. Despite her best efforts her braless tits now stretched the tank top to its breaking point.
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