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My evil brain hadn't caught up yet to the intent her question."I said how big are you?" She asked again.CHA-FUCKING-CHING!! Brain officially caught up. Is she asking what I think she's asking? I feigned a dumbfounded look. "How big am I? What do you mean...like how much I weigh?"Like a preppy schoolgirl, Kristen rolled her eyes and let out a huff, like I was some kind of idiot."I mean your dick. How big is your dick?" She re-stated firmly.My heart literally raced in excitement. Was she about to let me do what I think she was about to let me do???"Oh!" I replied, once again feigning shock. "Why?"She let out a sigh, as she shifted her eyes away from me and stared into oblivion, mustering up the courage with her next statement that would always be etched in my brain for all eternity."Coz I need to know how big your dick is if I'm going to agree to let you fuck me up my ass." she replied with a hint of embarrassment and resignation.HALLE-FUCKING-LLUJAH. My frustrations of the day. It’s crazy, I know. But they say he’s gonna be okay.”“He was shot? Who the fuck shot him?”“At this point nobody knows. Rhonda told me he was out in his garden pulling weeds and shit and next time she looked out he was laying on the ground. She thought he’d had a heart attack until the medics got there and found the bullet hole.”“His garden?” I said. I was even more shocked. “Fuck! And who is Rhonda?”“Rhonda...” he sounded puzzled. “You know, his wife.”“His wife!?”I was freaked beyond belief. More than the news that he’d been shot, it blew my mind to find out first that he had a wife and second that he did gardening shit. Roberto? I thought ... are we talking about the same Roberto? Porn king of the West coast and all of Europe but Germany? What the fuck?I don’t remember the rest of the conversation, my mind was slightly unhinged from all the revelations. Two days later Cherise called me, and filled me in a little more. They had found the sniper’s nest in the woods near his house, and.
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