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“I’ll fuck you so hard that you won’t be able to sit down for three days.”“Mmm. That sounds perfect. Maybe you should take me back to your place and fuck my brains out.”“What about Joanie?”“Oh, she’ll be fine. She knows all about the birds and the bees. Besides, she’s looking for a boyfriend of her own.”“I see!”Then Rita turned to Joanie and said, “I’m going to Bill’s place for a while. Don’t wait up.”Joanie stood up and said, “What? Are you going to have sex with him? You just met him!”“I might. But it’s none of your business if I do. Come on, Bill,” she said as she stood up and took my hand."Well. This is just great," Joanie said in disbelief. "You just met our neighbor an hour ago and now you're going to fuck him?"“Joanie!! Do not use that kind of language! You hear me?”“Yes,” Joanie said and stormed out. Seconds later I heard a door slam.“Don’t worry. She’ll get over it. She’s a typical teenager.”“How old is Joanie?”“s*******n, going on twenty-five. She’ll be eighteen next week. "She passes a document to Beverley, whose brows lift as she begins reading."Oh my," she grins. "Have you told them?" I'll leave that to you."As Fiona departs, I'm almost certain that she winks at me."I'd recommend that you sit down," says Beverley. "I'm serious. I have somenews for you." Can't be any more of a shock than finding out I was a hive queen." I wouldn't be too sure. What are you doing on February 26th next year?" Next year? How should I know?" Well, you'd be wise not to plan anything you couldn't put off for awhile." She hands me the document. "Congratulations, Ruth."And as I look in horror at the words her finger points to, another phrasecrashes through my head.Charlotte Annabel, D.O.B. 28/7/74, Bromley, Kent, UKIt never rains but it fucking pours.*There are two small bulbs on the panel to the right of the door. The redone is lit, and has been since Beverley left me standing here nearly tenminutes ago.She's doing it to prove how important she is. I bet she's sitting at.
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