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No, I didn’t make a hard copy. No, I don’t know what I’d do without you. Yes, you’ve saved my bacon – again. But all was not lost. Opening up my e-mails there it was. Not quite the answer to everything, and certainly not my play, but – wait for it – an e-mail from the man I’d had a crush on for eighteen months. And swear to God, in one evening, thanks to the brilliance that is modern technology I’d gone from being a passing acquaintance to the one he was going to bed to dream about tonight. And best of all, he asked whether I’d like to join him one evening for a bite to eat. (That’s our fourth and final mention and okay, so the spelling and the meanings are different but it’s still whether and it’s the kind of whether I like). More importantly, he wants to take me out. And best of all, he’s going on holiday for a week! That gives me seven days to lose at least half a stone, scrub every last coffee stain off my teeth, buff and cream my body seven times, grow my nails to a suitably. After 5 minutes of trying she just couldn’t get the last 2 inches in her. After another 10 minutes of fucking the toilet brush handle she managed to give herself a massive orgasm, and as her legs gave way she fell and got the last 2 inches and half of the brush spikes inside her cunt. She screamed out in pain and was sure that she was bleeding, but after checking she only had a tiny bit of blood leaking out of her. After another shower and more masturbating, she put her mini skirt, a plain white vest and no underwear , 5 minutes later there was a knock at the door. Lauren shook with anticipation as she went to the door, as she answered she expected to see the 2 men, but instead it was Tom, her neighbour, he said that he heard her scream and wondered if it was alright, Lauren went bright red and made up something instead of saying that she was masturbating with a toilet brush and she fell on it. She just said to him ‘Yes im fine, I saw a spider and it made me jump, that’s all’ he.
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