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Whoever was on the other end made the ex-SAS man smile. He pushed a button.“You got other I.D.?”I was flying out of country ... of course I had other I.D... “What do you want?” I said. “US passport, New Zealand passport, US Birth certificate, New Zealand Naturalization, Boat captain’s license, letter from President Clinton and a wallet full of family.”“What does the M really stand for?”“Me,” I said, “Surprise Me Flintkote.”He pushed the button on his phone, “Arrest them. Surprise Me Flintkote is standing in front of me ... Yes, I’m sure. Ask the woman what the M stands for. I’ll wait.” He switched to speaker.“She says Melody.”“The guy with her says he is John William Flintkote,” said the phone.“Walter,” I said. “Not William. I have one question.”“Go ahead.”“Is he pretty?”“Pretty?”“We’re triplets.”“I see,” said the phone, “No ... he and the girl don’t look anything alike.”“What are they trying to buy?” I asked.“A speedboat ... powered by a pair of Lamborghini V10’s.”“Absolutely not.. “Desperate beautiful woman. Big reward. Apply at Lance Armstrong Detective Agency, 211 South 4th.” When I got to my office on the morning the ad came out I found a long line of men stretching around the block. There must have been hundreds of them. Carlotta was waiting by the door. She was smiling. “There must be someone in among this crowd who knows how to find a pleasurenut,” she said. “Here’s how we’ll do this,” I said after we’d climbed the stairs and entered my office. I threw my fedora onto the hat rack. “You sit on the desk, be careful of the splinters, and I’ll send in one man at a time. I’ll give him a certain amount of time, let him out if he’s not successful, and then send in the next one. How long should I give them?” “Five seconds would be enough for a man in the know,” Carlotta said. “But let’s say two minutes.” “Two minutes it is,” I said. “Now let’s get you up on the desk.” Carlotta hopped up on the edge of the desk and looked at me. “Should I take my panties off?”.
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