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Slowly I turn and face my tormentor.I owe you an apology, dear reader, for I have been a little economical with the truth. I have drawn you pretty pictures with soft words and smooth flesh, but I am not to be trusted. I am a charlatan, a fakir, a peddler of half-truths and downright lies. Like a leashed puppy I have led you through a web of misdirection your eyes fixated by my slender silhouette, your nostrils filled with the heady aroma of my sex and your mind captivated by the throbbing in your groin.The truth is that I know this man/boy and he is no stalker. His only crime is one of innocence. Every day he climbs aboard my carriage and trails along behind me to the office block where we both work. Every day he teases me with his doe-eyes, soft lips and Bambi-like gracelessness. At lunchtime he sits laughing and joking with colleagues whilst I peer above my packaged Panini hoping for a glance, a smile, a waved hand and a tender word.I have become quite smitten. Nightly I have. I can tell she's totally sweet on me, but this story isn't about her. Which is a good thing, because she's way young for this crap and I don't want to get arrested. She could be pretty smokin' in a few years, but I digress.The grandfather clock downstairs chimes eleven and we're already two hours past her bedtime. I've got no idea how frisky her folks are feeling tonight, so I figure we ought to pack it in before they come home and I lose my cursory twenty bucks. We have one last deathmatch for the road and I drag her reluctantly into bed. Once she's settled, I exit and close the bedroom door, on the back of which is a poster her dream boy, Gary Sinise.Ah, blissful silence.The only thing that keeps me from geeking out completely is a delicate constitution. I need to eat real food once in a while, so no living on instant ramen and Mountain Dew. Hours of loud techno music and rhythmic explosions give me a headache. Now that the night's fun was over (or so I thought), I set up my laptop.
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