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”The blonde replied, “Well, I bet he won’t.”Jack placed $30 on the bar and said, “You’re on!”Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her $30 to Jack, saying, “Fair’s fair ... Here’s your money.”Jack replied, “I can’t take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 o’clock news and knew he would jump.”The blonde replies, “I did too; but I didn’t think he’d do it again.”Jack took the money.✧ ✧ ✧Say thanks to Allan for the following... How do pigs make coffee?With porculators... ✧ ✧ ✧Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven, where they are met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter. He says, “Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I’m granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want.” The first nun says, “I want-a to be Sophia Loren” and poof! she’s gone. The second says, “I want-a to be Madonna” and poof! she’s gone. The third says, “I want-a to be Sara. Divert the liquid wastes through her anus. Woe betide you if she does not recover completely from the operation," ordered the Emir."Master, this is not a simple matter; it will be a very expensive operation if you insist that the Medical Officer takes no risks," said the Chief Eunuch."He is not employed to deal with simple matters. This is my wish and it will be done. Furthermore it will be explained in detail to the woman before it is done, and she will be told that it is to prevent her damaging any other men by tempting them into such foolishness as overtook her husband."Turning away, he saw the head bodyguard, Maktum, gazing at Rubina with more interest than was perhaps proper."You saw her on the hunts, didn't you?" he asked."Yes, Master." And you would like to try her just once before I have her made useless?"The huge man's head hung low. He realised that he had offended the Emir greatly by staring at a woman in the harem, and prayed silently to Allah that he had not offended him.
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