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She said good-naturedly, "You blush too much."I blushed, shifting my gaze out the window.She asked, sounding surprised, "Do I make you uncomfortable?"I answered offhandedly, still gazing out the window. "Mmm, No."She said, "Sometimes I think there's something about me that makes some people a little... uneasy, I guess."I said, "I don't see how that would be possible. I mean, you're bright, you're friendly..."She said, "So are you." Well, you don't make *me* feel uneasy."She chuckled and insisted, with playful impatience, "Then why do you blush so much?"I looked at her, shrugging, and straightened in my chair so that I faced her fully again across the table and said, "It's just something I do, I guess. You don't make me uncomfortable."She gave me a teasing little grin. "Well, it's cute." Then she straightened her face and said, leveling her eyes at me with mock seriousness, "You just blushed again," and then she chuckled, and when I covered my face bashfully with one hand she laughed. It might be hard being female, but I'mdetermined to make the best of it. So I am working extra hard to catch up.As Paul, I was working hard to get into a good university course. I wasn'tgoing to waste that effort. My grades are improving, and slowly getting upto where they were before. I'm surprising a lot of teachers by how much Iknow. That is some satisfaction.I use my workload as an excuse not to date, because a couple of the guysseem determined to ask me out. No thanks - I'm not interested in dating aboy. Not yet, anyway.I also feel a lot weaker than before. I'm reminded of it every time Ispeak, but I also notice it every time I try to push or lift something.And yet, I've got to admit, I never used it much as a guy. I didn't playsport, and I was trying to get into computer programming, a career inwhich body strength - or the ability to quickly use the bathroom - doesn'tmatter.I thought about that parable in the Bible, where the man who didn't usehis gift had it taken away. Maybe.
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