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“Hi, I’m Terry, the owner, what may I do for you today?” he asked as he introduced himself.“I’m Rick Dalton, and this is my Mom, Debra, We’re here to get me enrolled in a training program and also get a personal trainer to assist me in physical fitness as well as the right dieting program,” I said as mom and I both shook Terry’s hand.“Well, let’s sit over here at the desk Rick, and get all your personal information, Debra, while we do this you’re more than welcome to walk through the gym and look our facilities over if you like.” Terry spoke to mom.“Thank you, I think I will take a quick look around.” Mom said.“Take this guest card and clip to your shirt so everyone will know you have permission to be here, we try to keep just anyone from wandering in here.” Terry said as he handed mom a plastic card on a chain that had a clip on the end.Mom went back through the door and Terry and I went about the process of getting me enrolled. I took the application and filled out all the blanks,. So afraid...Michael showed up after lunch. He looked at me. "Okay Nick, what's the problem today?" I shook my head, and closed my eyes."Did you ever have the feeling that the only way to end the pain is to stop fighting?" He got a strange look on his face. "And you can't stop 'cause that's how you've been taught to face the world?" He rolled over to me, and held my hand."Nick, we can never stop fighting. When we do, we die. But sometimes we need to quit being our own enemies, and fighting against ourselves."Was he right? Could I stop fighting myself and still face the world? Or myself? For what the shrink was telling me went against everything I had been taught. Yet it was what, in my weaker moments, I had dreamed about and wished for, until I caught myself, and forced the evil thoughts out of my head. We were still silently holding hands when the nurse came in, and chased Michael out while she did my thing with a bedpan. I wondered briefly which was worse, death or bedpans. It was a.
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