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My home phone is listed there on the lower right. Don't lose it. Call me if you need anything. I'll come right away. Are you sure you don't need me to come up with you? I'm so afraid for you." I'll be OK. I promise I'll call you later and let you know I'm alright." You better." Thanks for everything, Sharon," I said dumbly as I got out of the car. "No, wait a minute. That didn't sound right. I wouldn't be right here right now without you. I don't think I could ever come up with sufficient words to express how much I'm in your debt, and how happy I am you came into my life when you did." It's OK. I know how much you care. Please call me later." I will. I promise."For a brief second I thought she was going to tell me she loved me. But as I closed the door, she focused her eyes ahead and slowly drove away. I watched as she wheeled out onto the street and her taillights disappeared in the distance.I could smell Jazz when I opened the door to my apartment and the air inside hit my nose.. Her hot tears dropped onto my chest as I held and caressed her, never wanting to let her go.“Oh Chaaya, I love you so,” I murmured into her hair. “I never knew it could be like this. I am so grateful!”And I was. Through my friendship with Chaaya, culminating in our lovemaking, I had rediscovered my manhood. For years, I realized, I had been searching for my motherly acceptance and love through relationships with selfish, indifferent and often cruel copies of her. If I could make one of these women love me I believed, I could finally love myself. I would be complete. Chaaya, through her caring and compassion, taught me what a futile quest I was on and what a real and complete woman truly was. The other women in my life, including my sad mother, had no love to give. Chaaya had it and gave it to me in abundance, freely and without condition. “Chris, darling, this is a two way street,” she told me, wiping away her tears. “You make me feel so wanted, so sexy. After my husband died and the.
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