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Gently, I reached down to each one and assisted them to sit on my lap, one on each leg. As they settled in, somewhat gingerly and unsure of what to expect, I broke down and cried.I cried for the pain the two girls had gone through. I cried for the pain I had made their mothers inflict on them. My gentle lovers had been forced to enforce my cruel discipline. It had been the right thing to do, but it still hurt.As they felt the sorrow and remorse I was feeling, they, too, began to cry, helping me to grieve. We sat together, holding one another, supporting one another, loving one another. A fucking Kodak moment, if there ever was one.Finally, our tears and sobs lessened and stopped. Kleenex appeared and, to a chorus of honking that would have made a flock of geese proud, we cleaned ourselves up. I sat, one hand cupping one tit of Sally, the other hand cupping the tit of Nicole. They were still a little nervous at my anger and my unpredictability right at that moment, especially with all. ‘I understand Adam; if Yvan guides me it will work, I'm sure!' Now Adam smiled at me again: ‘Well, a good emotional trick is to be angry at the victim and develop hate like she did something bad. See her, and call her –bitch- in your mind; never feel any compassion: on the contrary. In practice: Yvan will assist you how to do the things, but you must do everything alone from the beginning. I mean: she will stand there in front of you with clothes on while you can look into her eyes. Yvan will let you strip her, and you must destroy her body piece by piece until she is no more. Look at us like soldiers: they are also paid to kill and some innocent people die and suffer because of them!' Now this was a correct argument…I said ‘yes Adam, I will go for it.’ ‘Super Dilmitri, then there is nothing more to say: Monday at 9 pm at the place our driver picked you up before; agreed?' ‘OK Adam, I will be there.’ Adam stood up, shook my hand and said ‘you will be fine' and left. I stayed to.
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