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"I nodded and said hello to Adara. Like every teenage girl in the world she blushed and giggled when I talked to her. Jamilah handed me the cup and by sitting back against the wall I was able to drink. The same approach worked for eating, as there was just enough chain to move my hands up and down about fifteen inches. The food bowl contained Kabsa (lamb and rice stew) and pita bread that tasted as good as anything I'd ever eaten. I demolished the food in the bowl as I chatted with Jamilah and her daughter. Truth be told, I enjoyed the company after hours alone in the dark cell. I also took an instant liking to Jamilah and Adara; they were both smart and lively.As soon as I finished my second cup of water the urine I had been holding at least eight hours demanded I set it free."Jamilah, I have to go to the bathroom," I said.She raised her eyebrows at me and I knew what her question was. I mimicked peeing with my forefinger and a hissing noise. My pantomime cracked Adara up. Jamilah. Although part of me knew there was a special, concrete explanation for this, another part of me was growing wild with yearning for him. For the Paul I knew was still alive inside this tough new shell. Probably the worst aspect of this for me was the fact that I no longer could count on any comfort whatsoever from Paul’s body. His withdrawal from me was absolute, total, so that even on the few nights that he deigned to sleep with me in the apartment, he simply flopped himself into bed and rolled over to face the wall. Nothing I did could revive or encourage him in any way, when I touched him, I could feel his body turn to stone, a rigidity so complete as to be positively frightening. After a few nights of this, interspersed with those terrifying long absences, I even found myself wishing that he were the type of man who could simply objectify women, take advantage of them, use them for their bodies alone, and that he would coldly ravage me, impale me on the sword of his mysterious.
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