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At the same time, there had been an undeniable sense of unbridled, unvarnished, and open sexual lust; and it had exhilarated me, even as the place itself appalled me! I'd been close to my mother growing up (not so much with my father), and I knew that she would have been more than a little horrified to have known that her only son had ended up in such a place as that! So, on the one hand, there was the unmistakable feeling of sexual excitement in having jerked that other guy off as I had, his cock poking through a hole in the plywood divider, and the feeling of having let my mother down in some way! I couldn't seem to separate the two from each other. They were connected, and in some fundamental way; something having to do with the way I'd been raised. My mother had had other ideas for her only son, but none of that was likely to ever come to pass. I knew, even then, that she was never going to be a grandmother; which is what she wanted so badly!Though it took some time before I went. I was going over to his room & was half expecting the waiter on the corridor. But anyways he was not there. I rang roshan’s door bell, & he opened it. He was definitely surprised at my change of dress. Probably he was expecting me in the black salwar kameez which i wore in the morning. This time i didn’t wait for him to call me inside, i went passed him, deliberately brushing by back with his body. Then i went into the room & sat on the sofa. He took a position opposite me. Though i was not so experienced with men by his face i could say that he had been masterbating. Oh god i thought, he must not waste his strength before we actually go for sex? Or was he a coward like other men & won’t approach me. Will he be satisfied only with masturbation? Am i teasing him too much? But then it was only to make him approach me! I was disappointed.We chatted for sometime & then he did something which lifted my spirits a bit. There was small glass table between the two of us. He put a magazine on.
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