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Ive been writing fiction up to this point, certainly informed my experience, but not a direct retelling. Perhaps its my comfort with my sexuality that allows me to tell this or some inner need for confession and comments that say Im not a total freak. I dont know, but I would love to hear what yall think. The history of my first sexual exploits must be understood in the context of both my abnormal body and the brainwashing I received from friends. I have always been a small girl, but when my chest started to develop it developed much faster and much larger than girls my size and age. When I was 16 I was already wearing a 32e, but it had started years before that. When other girls were wearing training bras, I was already using my moms old bras. Looking back I think it informed my thinking for many different reasons. First, I was being noticed and talked to different by men and boys from very early on. I was keenly aware that my chest got me attention, that men liked to look at my. Belinda teased my clit by licking me there in long strokes. With each participant’s poke I grimaced and groaned. I told myself it was from the pain, but my body let me know it was their feels and Belinda’s magic mouth that were doing it. I managed to keep my count correct. The last one was the asshole, Ronnie. He spit on his hands, and windmilled his arm, and then he stuck hard and fast, but on the wrong cheek. I screamed through my tears, ‘Twenty-five.’ Maybe Geoff hadn’t noticed. No such luck. ‘You jerk, Ronnie, you blew it,’ Geoff sarcastically said as I felt Ronnie push his luck and push fingers into both my holes with the same passion as he swung at my ass. There was nothing erotic or even sensual about his touch, it was all about control and power. That man scared the hell out of me. ‘Well Suzie, technically you deserve one more, but if you cooperate with Belinda I’ll let you off with one short on one cheek,’ Master kindly offered. Ever the rabble-rouser, I couldn’t help but.
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