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Once out of sight of the campground, I turned to Hazel, “Right, take your skirt off.”“Hell no! There will be people around,” she said, glancing left and right.“Not at this time of year. I’ve never seen a soul on this track, and have biked up it many times. They all do the track along the top of the ridge, to the lookout. After the rush of summer camping, no one ever seems to come on this lower track,” I replied.Hazel heard the authority in my voice and looking around nervously. Then she came to a discussion and tentatively unzipped the skirt. Don stepped up beside her and helped her out of the skirt. We continued walking up the track, then after about twenty meters, I told her to now remove her blouse. This she looked a lot more uncomfortable with, but Don again stepped in and helped her undo the buttons and slipped it from her shoulders. She now walked off wearing nothing but her very brief thong.After a few paces, I couldn't resist reaching forward and pushing two fingers. It was called the Horticultural Seed Catalog company. The name of their little newspaper was, "All Things Flowery."I got the Job! Mrs. Violet Periwinkle—I swear—I'm not joking here—that really was her name, filled me in on my duties."Dag," she said, throwing me a supercilious, somewhat jaundiced look."We want you to go out and see a couple of crazy people... , Mr. & Mrs. Honeysuckle. They're claiming we sold them a flower that talks!"They don't seem to mind that the flower talks; but, they do keep complaining that this flower uses... well... some pretty colorful language," she said."See if they'll let you interview this talking flower—and if you ever... tell anybody I ask you to do this interview... , I'm gonna deny it," she promised.Geez! I thought. Here we go again.About now, I'm looking for a lifeboat. I think I see the Titanic steaming toward me over the literary horizon... I meet Mrs. Rose Honeysuckle"Hello, are you Mrs. Honeysuckle?" I asked, giving her what I've been told is.
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