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She said the words almost as if choosing them had been difficult. Sid had disappeared, but he returned moments later with a tray, on which was a glass of cider for Fi, my pint, and two beef sandwiches. Sid put them down and disappeared again. We munched. When it was polite to speak, I swallowed my mouthful and spoke. ‘Will you be working for Sid then?’ ‘Urr, Well, I will do what I can. I don’t like hard jobs — using stuff sort of thing. I wash up and make the beds and stuff. I can do some of the cooking, but not the hard stuff. I’m a bit scared of electric things.’ She was not a conversationalist. We ate and drank our lunch. Then I picked up her case — Sid had made it look light — and led next door to my home. I left the case in our kitchen, and led her along the corridor. ‘I’ll show you the rooms. I’m afraid, it’s a bit of a mess.’ ‘Yes, Sid said that you’ve had a busy time.’ ‘Yes, and I am not too good at tidying up.’ I laughed. She smiled. This is my room, this is my son’s, then. The incident of the conflagration reminded her, and in her eyes much the worse offence, the general populace, about the events of Ladies’ Day. Jonathan Swift Chapter One and Only — The custom of Ladies’ Day in Lilliput. The empress pays a midnight visit. The toast to the empress. The result of the toast. The preparations for the whores. The actions of the naked women. The displacement of the staging. My sperm try to fulfil their function. The empress is not amused. — Ladies’ Day in Lilliput seems to me to have similarities to the ancient Romans’ celebration of Saturnalia. The Romans let servants rule their masters and indulge in unrestrained horseplay. The Lilliputians let women rule their men on Ladies’ Day. Common to both festivals was the understanding that any act committed by the unusually privileged group could not be redressed on days after the festival. Whether the understanding was strictly observed, either by Roman masters or Lilliputian men, was something that gives me.
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