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I have elected to watch him live his life with a person I know is not right for him and I have chosen to keep my mouth shut about my feelings indefinitely not matter how much it eats away at me. The worst part is that not a single one of my desires has waned. Not one has become less intense, or less aggravating, in the past weeks regardless of any logic I have tried to force myself to acknowledge. I thought the dreams of him would cease if we ended things but I could not have been more wrong. The sensual ones are what haunt me the most and make me feel the most shameful. I have spent many hours reminising about all of the fantasies we used to play through, remembering all the ways his words would send a fire throughout my body. All the while slowly killing myself with each memory that I dredge up.I recalled, more recently, a reverie of how we made love on a piano. One of my favorites. I remembered how he described every detail of how he would pleasure me with his tongue and it only. ............................................. As usual, nothing was said about what happened the night before in the bedroom. Mary gave me her agenda and a list of groceries to bring home. As promised, Sonny sought me out in the lunch room and joined me along with a couple of guys from my department and we all commiserated the whipping the Sox took the night before. I got up to return to work and Sonny joined me continuing to chat about the game as we headed to the men's room for release before returning to work. I somehow felt titillated and hoped I might catch a second glimpse of the young mans tool. I actually had somewhat of a semi-hardon as we approached the door. Luckily for me there were two adjacent stalls and because of our ongoing conversation I was able to watch him pull his long fat dick out. I watched him pull the skin back over the head before he bellied up to the stall. Again he pissed like a horse, his urine splashing loudly against the back of the.
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