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Well, let me try to explain.The events that I've set in motion, the things that I've brought down on my family are the stuff of pulp fiction. These aren't things that happen to normal people, people like us. Except they are. And in quiet moments of retrospection I sometimes worry whether I'll be able to survive this with my sanity intact, much less my marriage and my relationship with my children. Those things are already under attack.All of that is true. And yet at the same time I find myself living a long time fantasy that I have repressed for most of my life. It turns out that the reality is every bit as exciting as the fantasy.Our problems started almost a year ago. My husband lost his job when the company that employed him for almost sixteen years went bankrupt. I couldn't blame him for that, of course. But sometimes when things were rough I found myself resenting him even when I knew it wasn't fair and I had to guard against thinking that way.It shook us up. How could it not.. She was obviously distraught, be upset she scooted away a little, and said, “ I think I need to go home.”It was early morning now and after giving her a quick kiss on the cheek, I asked if she was okay. She nodded, got out of bed, and after subtly wiping her crotch with the sheet, she quickly grabbed her clothes off the floor, and headed toward the bathroom.As I laid there for a moment, I started to worry. Eventually, I decided to get dressed too and as I pulled on my pants, she came out of the bathroom. She was still obviously troubled and as we walked to the front door, I again asked if she was okay. We kissed one last time before she left but it was superficial, something had definitely changed.The next time I saw her, she was standoffish. It was at the Starbucks, I didn’t know what to do, I could tell there was something bothering her about seeing me, so I simply order my usual latte and left. Later I sent her a couple text messages asking if I could see her again and asking if.
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