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"You should enjoy it while we can." What if... I don't want to ever stop being Leah?" I think that would be wonderful," she replied and kissed me again.By the time the band's second album went five times platinum, I wasliving full time as Leah and had no intention of going back. I took thestep to legally change my name to Leah B. Shepard and I barely owned anymen's clothes. I moved in with Sophie, more to save on the expense thananything else, especially since we were never at home.It was about that time that I started experimenting sexually. There werealways good-looking men hitting on Sophie, Delia and Abby. Really, theyhit on all of us, I was just good at deflecting the attention back to thereal girls of the band. Until one night, backstage, when I didn't.I'm not sure why the urge came to me when it did. I had never consideredmyself bisexual, but there was something about this guy that just seemedto hit all the right buttons. Before I knew what I was doing, I hadpulled him. Over a few months the subject cropped up occasionally but not in any great depth, more in lighthearted teasing and husband/wife banter. In a moment of weakness after lovemaking I confessed to Sue that I had masturbated at the thought of her with a black man. She was at first shocked, surprised then eventually amused and then indulged in her own teasing of me from time to time. As this mutual teasing went on the reference to black men became more and more regular until inevitably I guess looking back, I asked her pointedly if she still thought about sleeping with black men. Her hesitation in answering gave me her true feelings rather more than the "I love you, im married to you, i only want you" response that she gave. Moving on....and after nibbling away at her defences about this I told Sue that if she wanted the real thing rather than just watch films I didnt see why it should affect our relationship if it was purely an extension of what we were now watching virtually every.
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