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“You’re going to practice applying your own lipstick.”I was tempted to punch her in the face right then but I knew I couldn’t. She sat me down at her desk. There was a lipstick tube, a hand mirror and a box of tissues. She demonstrated on herself and then had me practicing for the next half hour. I thought I had it down pretty good after about 15 minutes but she insisted I continue.“You’ll get to the point where you’ll be able apply your lipstick perfectly without even thinking about it.”“I don’t want to get to that point,” I replied. “Not only do I not want to do it, I don’t want to even think about doing it.”“That’s not your choice now.” I thought my sister was finished with me but no such luck. She had me applying skin moisturizers all over the place while she checked and cleaned my ear piercings.“I’ve always wanted a sister and now I have one.”“I’m not your sister, Fiona. I’m your brother. I wish you and Carla would stop with this B.S. It’s gone too far already.”“You’ll. It’s Bud, which is a surprise; I’d have expected Stella. Then I notice it’s one of those 568ml cans unique to Bud that is almost the length of my forearm. Cunning.I get out my phone and open the Grindr app. I don’t get much hassle for being trans on there, and it’s usually from losers whose ‘firm views’ wither under fire from a series of one-liners I have devised for the purpose. People slag Grindr off, but the trans apps are useless, and Tinder is too fiddly. I wait for the app to refresh with my new location, gathering interest for use on my return journey.Of course, I don’t really care about Grindr. I care about Millwall, whose presence has evolved into a smorgasbord placed just out of reach of a starving woman. Phones are as much a prop as anything else. ‘Look how busy and popular I am’ goes one narrative. ‘Regard my concerned expression and consider what daunting drama my life involves’ goes another. I am currently essaying the ‘I’m a bit ditzy so don’t know how cute I am as I.
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