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Now I didn't trust him anymore, I didn't even like my back turned on him when he was fucking me. Three months before he had gone crazy, drunk and angry over nothing. Pinned me to the wall by my throat, thrown me across the bedroom. Told me I was not leaving alive. I'd had to beg for my life that night.Now I was back here. In part because I loved him.In part for another reason.There is something holy about the man I love holding me in his dominance, me on my knees there to serve my lord. It is like being held in a fist of iron but caressed by the softest silk. As if the moment is hallowed, blessed by a higher power - and I am blessed to serve this divine man who gives me beautiful love and blissful orgasms. He is my master and protector and everything I've ever dared to dream of - except that Trevor isn't and never will be. I've given my heart too much too soon and too deeply. Even after I'm removed from this situation, my heart will scar. I know this as he is fucking me. He's. I’m his daughter, Johanna, you can’t have the same feelings for him that I do.”She put her arms around me and kissed my hair.“You do love him, don’t you?”“Yes,” I whispered. “God help me, I do.”She held me tighter.“You’ve got to fight it, Johanna. You’ve got to get over him. Otherwise, you’ll just make yourself miserable.”“Why do you say that?”“Jack and your sister –”“I know,” I said. “I’m not my sister. I wouldn’t treat him like she did.”“It’s not how you’ll treat him. It’s how he’ll treat you. I know him, he’s no good for you.”We began walking again and did not speak for about a mile. She turned into Willard’s Woods and got on to the trail before she spoke again.“He can’t help himself. As his daughter, I’ve learned to accept him as he is. But you couldn’t do that as his lover.”“What do you mean?”“A few months ago, we were having dinner at a restaurant in Boston. I could see the waitress giving him the eye, they exchanged a bit of innuendo at the table. Before we ordered dessert, he.
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