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> "Where have you been?" his wife demanded.> "I can't lie to you," he replied,> "I'm having an affair with my secretary.> We had sex all afternoon."> She looked down at his shoes and said:> "You lying bastard!> You've been playing golf!">>> The 2nd Affair>> A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters> but always talked about having a son.> They decided to try one last time> for the son they always wanted.> The wife got pregnant> and delivered a healthy baby boy.> The joyful father rushed to the nursery> to see his new son.> He was horrified> at the ugliest c***d he had ever seen.> He told his wife: "There's no way I can be the> father of this baby.> Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!> Have you been fooling around behind my back?"> The wife smiled sweetly and replied:> "Not this time!">>> The 3rd Affair>> A mortician was working late one night.> He ! examined the body of Mr. Schwartz,> about to be cremated,> and made a startling discovery.> Schwartz had the largest. Every now and again I’d look back from the chair I was sitting in and see you flirtatiously running your fingers along their arms or hips, obviously turned on by each of them; they in turn were simultaneously playing with your hair and I could hear giggles proceeded by a few muffled whispers. I had a feeling this would be a good night for both of us. Unfortunately the girls had to leave, but not before a fairly impressive three way make out which all the guys in the place had a chance to admire and approve. As I sat with them, watching whatever sport was on TV and the haze of shisha smoke becoming thicker, I heard them say how hot it was to see three drop dead gorgeous chicks making out and passing their hands all over each other’s bodies. One of them, Matt, said “did you see the one with the skirt? Sandy was rubbing her thigh and she just grabbed her wrist and brought it up to her pussy! The chick’s not wearing underwear and I saw it all!” I thought to myself…Callie was the only one.
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