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I drank Becky’s vile blue gin until I got sick, and then drank the rest, finally passing out eventually. I was in limbo. Becky’s kids were flying in from their respective colleges. They didn’t know me from Adam. I had met her daughter Kelly once, but had never met her son. Becky’s mother and ex-husband were taking care of the details. I didn’t know either of them. I was… who the hell knows what I was, besides alone. The service took place a couple of days later. I arrived early and stood at the front of the church, watching the people pour in. Most of the people from work were there, but I didn’t see anyone that fit the part of ‘Jerry’. Just as well, since I had no idea what I would say to the guy. Becky’s daughter Kelly recognized me at the door, a beautiful young woman with her mom’s red hair and creamy white complextion. Kelly introduced me to her brother Eric, who was just as I had imagined him from Becky’s descriptions, a bohemian type with his mom’s outgoing personality. They. He stared for a second. Deedee smiled blankly back. Dave squinted. Deedee squinted back. Dave scowled. Deedee scowled back. Dave took a step forward. “Are you, were you, masturbating?” “Something like that.” Dave threw up his arms. “Babe, I don’t want you to feel neglected. We could," he glanced wistfully towards his toolbox, “you know,” he sighed, “do it, if you want.” “Oh, Baby, you’re so sweet, but you’re in your little zone there, I’d hate to ruin that for you.” “Deedee, you’re the best! I promise I’ll be all yours as soon as I’m done with this.” “Take your time.” “Or maybe after that leaky pipe.” “I’ll wait if it takes forever.” “Cool!” Dave practically skipped around the room sticking his probes in the outlets, gave his bride a quick kiss on the cheek, and clearly skipped off looking for his joint compound. Deedee picked up where she left off, got herself off, and then got herself off of Honey Bear. “Oof!” Honey Bear exclaimed as Deedee plopped down onto his chest and gobbled.
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