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"The nurse and the doctor on duty came into the room and our little moment of special time together was over. They fussed about dosage for my painkiller and I ended up going back to sleep before they'd figured it out."I thought after the gang thing in eighth grade, you weren't going to do this again," Mom said. I was awake and aside from local pain in my face and side, I was fine and ready to go home. It turned out that they were giving Rhonda and me the same painkillers now, a little cocktail of Vicodin and Vioxx. It came with a warning not to sign contracts. Oh well."Um, wasn't my choice?" I suggested hopefully. Fortunately, Mom laughed."Well, if you can stand by yourself and put your pants on, we can get you out of here," Dad said. "Both of you. Although you, young lady, don't need to stand on your own. We'll help you."Two wheelchairs stood at the ready by our beds."Do I really need to ride in a wheelchair?" I asked."Hospital policy," our nurse said. It was the nurse who had helped. "OLD" IS WHEN ... An "all-nighter" means not getting up to use the bathroom.AND"OLD" IS WHEN ... You are not sure these are jokesThese are compliments of DennisThe North Dakota Department of Labor claimed a small Bismarck farmer was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate him.Department of Labor employee: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.Farmer: Well, there's my farm hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board.Then there's the mentally challenged worker. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.NCDL employee: That's the guy I want to talk to ... the mentally challenged one.Farmer: That would be me.A foursome of guys is waiting at the men's tee while a foursome of women is.
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