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He sees an old lady yanking on her boobs and an old man jerking off. He is so freaked out that he goes to the next house and says “What’s up with your neighbours?” and the owner of the house says “Oh that’s the Robinson’s, they’re both deaf. She’s telling him to go milk the cow and he’s telling her to go fuck herself!”An out of work actor gets a call from his agent one day. “I’ve got you a job” says the agent. “That’s great!” says the actor “What is it?” “Well” says the agent “it’s a one-liner” “That’s okay” replies the actor “I’ve been out of work for so long I’ll take anything. What’s the line?” “Hark I hear the cannons roar” says the agent. “Hark I hear the cannons roar?” the actor questions. “Yes, Hark I hear the cannons roar” confirms the agent. “I love it” says the actor “When’s the audition?” “Wednesday” says the agent.Wednesday comes and the actor arrives at the audition. He marches on stage and shouts: “Hark I hear the cannons roar!” “Brilliant” says the director “You’ve got. .?"Then she laughed, "I was going to say have you ever had your pussy licked by two horny girls at the same time." No, I must admit I haven't." Well I hadn't either before last night, but I sure as hell have now!" Good was it?" Incredible Tommy" she giggled, "I could play with myself now while I think about it." Be my guest" I laughed, "But don't make me crash." I think I'd better wait, Tommy, I really want to get this furniture sorted out today and don't forget your greenhouse this afternoon."But even as she said it, she reached for my hand and took it off the steering wheel,"But once we've done it all, I'll let you take these off" and opening her legs, placed my hand on the front of her panties,"With your teeth!"The delivery van pulled up outside Joe's shop just as we did and for the next three hours, we fetched, carried, pushed, shoved, heaved and sweated.I was an absolute gentleman, I even helped to steady her as she stood on the step ladder to put up her new curtains, It wasn't.
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