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"Moments later, I heard my brother arrive home; my wife placed her cell phone on the counter-top."Now that's a sight worth coming home to," I heard Brian shout."Thank you, you said that you wanted me nude when you got home," my wife replied, "So, nude I am for you."I could hear a lot of kissing, then Brian said, "God, I love these firm cheeks of yours."I assumed that he was holding her ass."And I love how soft these tits are," he said further, "You like me biting them like this, don't you?'"Brian, stop!" she shouted, "I'm trying to pour you a cup of coffee."I heard lots more kissing. It seemed to go on for ages. Finally, Amanda asked him to check on dad."I haven't checked on him in the past hour and a half, could you run and check that he's okay?" Could you quickly run and check please, "Brian replied, "I need to take these boots off and drink this coffee, I've had a long day." Pass me my sweater and jeans then," she answered."You're okay like that," Brian said, "You've only got to. It's a directly proportional relationship, in my experience. The better things are, the faster they go to Hell.I didn't do anything wrong, really! I swear! I just forgot what my Dad always told me about things and not fixing them if they weren't broken. Really, all I was trying to do was make things better. Honest!Anyway, Sally announced that our new home would be ready in four weeks. The carpet layers, painters and other craftsmen were under pain of death to have it done by that time. Listening to her describe the hubbub and chaos of the renovation, I reminded myself never to negotiate with that woman unless we were both naked at the time. She was tough and the house would be finished exactly on schedule. Or else.Her announcement set into motion a long formulated plan of mine and I immediately began making telephone calls to a few select friends. That's not where I screwed up.That happened the next day, that fateful day, a day that will live in infamy, a day that would... — well,.
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