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"Static?" I thought. "That's weird." Weirder still, Julie apparently feltnothing, as she turned and entered the changing room.I sat down, and placed the purse on my lap. I still felt a little strangefrom that shock - not woozy, exactly, but a sort of tingling still filledmy body. As the minutes went by, the tingling seemed to build, ratherthan diminish. Partly out of boredom, partly to get my mind off of thetingling, I did the unforgivable - I opened Julie's purse and began torummage through it.I know, I know, a woman's purse is sacrosanct - her own personal, privatespace from which all men are excluded. But I couldn't help myself - no,really, I couldn't - it was almost like my body had a mind of its own,and I was merely an observer.There wasn't much of interest to observe, I had to admit. A packet oftissues. A hair brush. Two condoms. I had to smile at that - Julie wasalways prepared for any eventuality! Keys. A few flat plastic containersI assumed were powders and such. Then, I saw. Reliable. Pull out your Dirty Weekend Dildo. Flip the switch on that old vibramagic orgasmatron!" Oh, no," I shook my head, "that's not for me. Plastic, latex, rubber, I just don't like it. Okay, once upon a time, with this huge king kong thing. It was the color of the flesh crayon. Sort of like a loaf of puffy white bread. Okay to ingest and it sure filled me up, but it got me nowhere. I mean, I need a little visual stimulation, but everytime I opened my eyes it was to the sight of the evil alien monster trying to impregnate me. I couldn't get beyond good god girl, you're messin' around with a dong!"Well, I knew this gal who swore by cucumbers, baked in the oven at a very low heat. Not too mushy. And of course let it cool down a bit." Kimbra! I'm flesh and blood. I don't want to have sex with a vegetable. Grr-rr. I want meat." Okay, a nice thick salami, whatever." I don't do pork." I understand they are doing wonderful things with turkey these days." Kimbra, you just don't.
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