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" First of all, don't talk about my mother. She doesn't give a damn about me and I have realized that it doesn't matter any more." Of course it matters, cherie."Jen went on as if she hadn't heard her. "And who said anything about children? I adore Hannah but I know I'm not her mother. As for Alex, what can I say? If he doesn't want me to leave, he will stop me."Maddy patted her hand lovingly. "And if he doesn't?" Then I'll find a way to be alone again," she whispered. "There's always a way." You love him." It was a statement.She didn't bother denying it. "These few weeks have been great. More than great actually. But I can't force him to be with me. It has to be his choice." I've never heard such bullshit in my life."Jen turned to look at Maddy, shocked. She had never heard her talk like that. But it wasn't Maddy's voice that had uttered those words. Actually it was Alex leaning on the door-frame and she was sure that he had been listening very carefully to her conversation with Maddy. Her arms and back cramped from the strain of her ordeal. After trying to stand up twice and falling each time, she lay on the cold, wet ground for a while, simply letting the rain fall on her while she rested.The cold rain that had been pelting her skin when she was aloft was, in reality, just a light sprinkle on the ground, although the wetness she lay in indicated that it had rained harder, earlier. Struggling over onto her back, she could see that the landscape rose dizzily around the dark clouds in every direction. The crystal sun was shining on several edges, reminding Béla of a giant, constructed stage intended for an outdoor play. She couldn’t see the crystal sun, itself, because of the angry storm clouds rushing above her. Finally catching her breath and feeling a slight promise in her body that it may someday obey her again, she looked at the farmhouse. Despite the fact that it looked dark and deserted, she could feel someone inside, weak and sick, radiating grief and.
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